For English weddings, the bride and groom typically have a list of wedding gifts but for Chinese, we are more practical. All we want is money, partially to pay for the wedding costs and partially to pay your mother-in-law!
Chinese Wedding – Bridal Door Game
You might be wondering what is a Bridal Door Game? This is a game played when the groom picks up his bride on the day of the wedding. The bridesmaids will give the groom and his group of ‘brothers’ (best men) a list of tasks/games to do before the groom is allowed to fetch his bride. But they have to pass all the tasks/games!
According to my uncle, this game was not commonly played during his time for his dialect (Teochew or Hokkien). It is more commonly played for Cantonese. Hence he didn’t have any photos to share with me this week.
Nowadays, it is common regardless of the bride and groom’s dialect. I was my sister’s maid of honour but did not fly back to Singapore until one week before the wedding. So her group of bridesmaids had already written a list of tasks/games to play and prepare the items to buy.
Chinese Wedding Page Boy / Small Uncle
Hope you’ve enjoyed my Chinese Wedding series so far where I have covered gifts, tea ceremony, hair combing ceremony and Yue Lao. This week, I am writing about ‘small uncle’ or in English tradition this is called a Page Boy. In a Chinese Wedding, our ‘small uncle’ have a very important role than just walk together with the bride.
Who can be Small Uncle?
Each bride and groom will have one boy each that is closely related to the family. For my sister’s wedding, they decided to ask my son to be their page boy.
Their first task of the wedding day:
On the wedding day, when the groom arrives at the bride’s house, he is not allowed to open his car door but has to wait for the small uncle to open it for him. The small uncle opens the door and brings a pair of oranges to welcome the groom. In return, the groom would give him ang pow (red packet).
This photo shown the bride’s small uncle opening the door for the groom.
Chinese Wedding Yue Lao
Following my recent theme on Chinese traditions, I decided to write about Yue Lao who is the god of marriage. Without him, there wouldn’t be any wedding. According to legend, Yue Lao appeared as an old man under the moon. He is like cupid but instead of holding a bow and arrow, he is holding a red string. If he ties the red string onto the couple, they will fall in love and get married.
In the traditional Chinese wedding custom, the bride and bridegroom walks together holding a length of red cloth with a big red ribbon in the middle. This is symbolism of their match by Yue Lao. I don’t think this has been commonly practised in Singapore.
Chinese Wedding Combing Hair Ceremony
I am back with more Chinese Wedding posts! This week I am going to write about the combing hair ceremony. Do check out my Chinese tea ceremony and wedding gifts if you missed those!
Why it is necessary for hair combing (梳頭, shūtóu)?
Chinese believe that it will bring long and lasting marriage. So both bride and groom will have their own hair combing ceremony.
When should it be done?
It is conducted on the eve of the wedding by the women, typically the parents.
In this photo of my aunty, the ceremony is done before the groom came to fetch the bride. Both parents said the four blessings:
一梳梳到尾 (1st combing, be together till the end of the road)
二梳百年好合 (2nd combing, happiness and harmony together till old age)
三梳子孙满堂 (3rd combing, blessed with many children and grandchildren)
四梳白发齐眉 (4th combing, blessed with longevity)
Chinese Wedding Tea Ceremony
The Wedding Tea Ceremony is one of the most important events at a Chinese wedding. My mum insisted we must have a tea ceremony because we didn’t get married in a proper Singaporean Chinese way. Mr C and I got married in Bath and it was a small wedding with close family and friends only. So when I told some of our friends that we are having a tea ceremony after the registration, no one understood what that meant. As a result of the mix-up, two of our friends went back home after our registration and missed the wedding dinner. Sometimes it is hard to explain to others why we have a Chinese tea ceremony during the wedding day so I decided to write this post.
Why do we have a tea ceremony?
It is to introduce the newly wedded couple and show respect to their families. There are different types of tea ceremonies according to the groom’s dialect like Teochew, Cantonese etc.
When do we have a tea ceremony?
Nowadays, tea ceremonies combine both the bride and groom’s family as it is so much easier to do everything in one. It can be at any location but it has to be held straight after the registration of marriage or when they reach the Groom’s house.
