Cuisine & Culture the Chinese Family Way
What is Confinement?
It is a postnatal practice aimed at helping a new mum recover from pregnancy, labour and birth. It also means the new mum and baby are confined at home. For Chinese, the period lasts for a whole month, which will coincide with baby’s first month. During this time, the new mums have a lot of taboos and restrictions.
In many countries like the USA, they celebrate baby shower before the baby is born. As for Chinese custom, this is traditionally celebrated one month after the baby is born. This also coincides with the end of the new mum’s confinement period. During the confinement period, visiting the new mum and baby is not advisable. The full month is the day where both mother and baby are introduced to the extended relatives and friends.
You might be wondering what is a Bridal Door Game? This is a game played when the groom picks up his bride on the day of the wedding. The bridesmaids will give the groom and his group of ‘brothers’ (best men) a list of tasks/games to do before the groom is allowed to fetch his bride. But they have to pass all the tasks/games!
Hope you’ve enjoyed my Chinese Wedding series so far where I have covered gifts, tea ceremony, hair combing ceremony and Yue Lao. This week, I am writing about ‘small uncle’ or in English tradition this is called a Page Boy. In a Chinese Wedding, our ‘small uncle’ have a very important role than just walk together with the bride.
Following my recent theme on Chinese traditions, I decided to write about Yue Lao who is the god of marriage. Without him, there wouldn’t be any wedding. According to legend, Yue Lao appeared as an old man under the moon. He is like cupid but instead of holding a bow and arrow, he is holding a red string. If he ties the red string onto the couple, they will fall in love and get married.
I am back with more Chinese Wedding posts! This week I am going to write about the combing hair ceremony. Do check out my Chinese tea ceremony and wedding gifts if you missed those!
Why it is necessary for hair combing (梳頭, shūtóu)?
Chinese believe that it will bring long and lasting marriage. So both bride and groom will have their own hair combing ceremony.
When should it be done?
It is conducted on the eve of the wedding by the women, typically the parents.
In this photo of my aunty, the ceremony is done before the groom came to fetch the bride. Both parents said the four blessings:
一梳梳到尾 (1st combing, be together till the end of the road)
二梳百年好合 (2nd combing, happiness and harmony together till old age)
三梳子孙满堂 (3rd combing, blessed with many children and grandchildren)
四梳白发齐眉 (4th combing, blessed with longevity)
Qing Ming festival is a day where you pay respects at your departed loved one’s grave. The day varies each year as it goes according to the Chinese lunar calendar. This year it falls on the 5 April 2014. However, it is an acceptable tradition for the families to pray to their ancestors 10 days before and 10 days after the actual day. This is to avoid major congestions at the cemeteries and temples. As many countries like Singapore are densely populated and short of land, most of the deceased are cremated. If you would like to know how this festival originated, check out Chinese Culture for more details.
Now I like to share with you some photos of how it looks. Besides offering the traditional types of gold ingots and money, there are now offerings that include high tech gadgets to allow the afterlife to “catch up” with trends!
My granddad passed away in 1989 on Chinese New Year day. So on every Chinese New Year day, besides the celebrations, we will also offer joss sticks. These photos were taken a couple years ago before the 25 years lease is up. Now my family has moved and cremated my granddad and placed his remains along with my grandma who passed away on 24 March 2013.
The Wedding Tea Ceremony is one of the most important events at a Chinese wedding. My mum insisted we must have a tea ceremony because we didn’t get married in a proper Singaporean Chinese way. Mr C and I got married in Bath and it was a small wedding with close family and friends only. So when I told some of our friends that we are having a tea ceremony after the registration, no one understood what that meant. As a result of the mix-up, two of our friends went back home after our registration and missed the wedding dinner. Sometimes it is hard to explain to others why we have a Chinese tea ceremony during the wedding day so I decided to write this post.
Last week, I wrote a blog post about Chinese superstitions when entering a hotel room, this week I would like to share some tips of gift ideas to avoid buying for your Chinese friend. I find that it is sometimes not easy to understand one person culture but by learning through interaction or reading will help each other to understand and live in a better and tolerable environment.
Chinese Superstitions to enter a Hotel Room! Last February, my mum and sister both flew to the UK to visit us. While they were here, we all went on a road trip to Scotland. You can read more about our Scotland trip with Barny here.
We stayed at Premier Inn throughout our holiday at various locations. The last location was Edinburgh, where we happened to have opposite rooms to my sister. I noticed that my sister went through her hotel routine. She knocked on the door and said we are just sharing the room with you for two nights, thank you. This triggered memories for me when I was younger I was told that I must do this hotel routine and I had forgotten! Okay, not really. I never knock the door but each time I go into the hotel room, I will inform ‘them’ quietly that we will be sharing ‘their’ room. Mr C does not believe in these Chinese superstitions thing! He thinks I am totally crazy to do this!
I had two separate unpleasant ghost experiences while staying in a hotel with him while we were in Italy and Japan. So he was used to me doing such crazy things while in a hotel room. I don’t practise these superstitions as much as I used to be because both of my children had started questioning my bizarre behaviour.
Many of you might recall that I had recently written a series blog posts for Chinese New Year and that this year is the year of the Horse. In the Chinese zodiac, the horse came in seventh out of the 12 year cycle of the animals. If you would like to find out more about the Chinese zodiac animals, click here to read more. Why does the horse come in seventh in the cycle? Legend has it that the sneaky Snake hid itself on the Horse’s hoof. Before crossing the finishing line, the Snake frightened the Horse and took the 6th spot and left the horse in 7th.
Sadly tomorrow is the last day of the Chinese New Year celebrations and this is also my last post for the Chinese New Year theme. Hope you all have fun reading my blog posts from making Chinese New Year lantern crafts to foods!
A reunion dinner is held on the eve of the Chinese New Year, during which family members get together to celebrate. It used to be dinner time where all family members gather around but due to work or other family commitments, it can be any time of the day as long as it is on the eve.
Today, I would like to take you on a journey to see Chinese New Year goodies found in Singapore Chinatown. Living there for over 20 years and going to Chinatown in Outram Park is one of my highlights and recommendations to soak in the new year atmosphere.
Since I moved to the UK, I miss the opportunity to shop for the full range of Chinese New Year goodies. Some of these goodies can be found in UK Chinese supermarkets though so take a closer look if you get chance!
This coming Chinese New Year of the Horse falls on 31 January 2014 (Friday). In Singapore, on the eve of Chinese New Year, everyone will go home to have a reunion dinner before heading to the temple (if you are Buddhist) or go to Chinatown or River Ang Bao or some might just stay at home!
